The unfortunate case of gum

Well said, Guy-From-Seinfeld-I-Forgot-The-Name-Of, well said.

Well said, Guy-From-Seinfeld-I-Forgot-The-Name-Of, well said.

Whether the flavor be fruity, minty, or last-only-three-seconds, for most, gum is commonplace to people this day and age. You can chew it at home to relieve stress, at work to fill time, or right after a meal that you can’t believe you paid for. Almost everyone you see, meet, or interact with has some form of gum on them.

I personally love gum. I love gum so much my family normally keeps me away from it since I devour whole packs within the day. If I could, I would probably be chewing gum right now.

As opposed to this however, I hate the use of gum in school.

Unlike a minor section of students, several teachers, and yours truly, not a lot of students have respectable manners or know when and where certain things are appropriate—like when to chew gum, for instance.

Some students will walk around school with their mouths almost permanently open, smacking their internal payload for the whole world to see, hear, and smell. Others will take pride in their choice of chewable mouth wads so much they display it just outside of their mouths to catch both some wind and eyes.

Few, once they’ve undoubtedly finished off any last trace of flavor or texture, will find the literal ten second trip to the nearby trash can far too strenuous for their feeble millennial bodies and will—in a brilliant case of collective thinking—stick their gum upon a variety of different surfaces.

Surfaces include tables, desk tops, desk bottoms, floors, walls, pillars in the courtyard, chairs, anywhere you would’ve liked to sit, the outside of the trash can, etc.

Clearly, the face of a cunning individual.

Truly, we are in an age where anything is possible and nothing is out of reach. Mankind will look back on days like this for centuries to come to revel in the stupidity of the world that is improper gum chewing.

For now, let us sane people try to mitigate any damage by keeping the contents of our mouths to ourselves and by reporting any improper gum disposal, whether in the act or to someone who can clean up the mess properly.